Elephant Poops Children

ACTION NEWS!

This just in.

Reports of a child eating menace have flooded our newsroom. A large elephant posing as a piece of playground equipment has been spotted around the city. It's appearance has co-incided with the modification of children at these playgrounds. Children, believing this creature to be an ordinary slide, have entered the elephant only to return to their parents completely altered.

Mrs.Rowena Herfblocken of Littlesnoz had this to say, "My little Tommy used to be such a quiet boy. He always came home from school and sat in the corner, humming quietly to himself. Never was any trouble. Now, since the elephant...He has changed. I never know where he is. He's always running around, jumping on the furniture, wanting to go back to the "park" and "his elephant" and...worst of all... all he talks about is poop."

Citizens are advised to contact the nearest SPCA, keep their children indoors, and remain calm if they happen to see this creature.

We will keep you updated with further stories on the hour.

I saw this just the other day on one of my favorite sites, Apartment Therapy (which they received from Dark Roasted Blend) and I just had to share. Check out the slide! Many of the other playgrounds were in serious disrepair but this one is just plain funny. I know a lot of kids who would love to be "pooped" out. (and a lot of parents who wish their kids were pooped before they were.) Anyway, here's the link.

Elephant Bum

Hope, Time and Love

Hi There,

Just something short and fun. Today I thought I would play with words. Three of them to be exact. Hope, Time and Love. Feel free to bend them to your will, it will be interesting to see what you come up with.

On another note: Yay post #2!

Hope is running amok. Time is making a break for hopeless wasters. Love is settling for the best that it can find and finding it is the best it can hope for. Time will wait for this Love the most.

Playing With People: Office Space ... The Final Frontier

If you were to walk into any room, how would you know who the leader is? The gleam in their eyes? The fact that they are standing? Their snappy outfit? Not if my university professors had anything to do with it. No, the secret of discovering a leader’s identity is this: we always give leaders their space.

Want to toy with your leader a little? Play with that space. In fact, completely ignore it.

During a meeting sit as close as possible to the leader, move a chair if you have to. You will probably be looking directly up the leader’s nose, it’s a small price to pay. Don’t look down at your papers but enjoy a few minutes of closeness with the one in power. Watch their face intently and only look away to make a few important notes … they will think you are so attentive … a little strange … but eager to climb that corporate ladder!

Playing with People: Smiles

When I was little I had one friend who could get me to do almost anything. Honestly, she just had to open her mouth and my brain would immediately shut off. Of course, she would play tricks on me all the time. Her best one, and one that I laughed at a lot later, was getting me to read the menu at McDonalds.
     “Hey Cara, what does it say on the bottom of the menu there?”
     “Can’t you read? It says Smiles, free.”

She knew she was about to reel me in. I never could resist a good deal.

     “Why don’t you go ask for one?”
     “What, a smile? It’s just a joke.”
     “Oh, no. This is different. It’s special.”

Boy was I excited now. Something other than the Treat of the Week was free and I was about to get one of my very own. I skipped up to the counter. Peering down at me was a very tall teenager. I wouldn’t let that intimidate me, no siree bob.

     “Welcome to McDonalds, make I take your order?”
     “Yes, I’d like a smile please.”

She looked at me and smiled.

     “Ok, could I please have one?”

She glared but her mouth smiled even larger.  

     “Please? Could I have one?”

She wasn’t even trying now.  “Look kid. Very funny, ha, ha. Stop asking.”
I couldn’t understand, I wasn’t laughing. “But it’s right up there on the menu … Smiles Free.”
“I get it kid. Go away.”
“But can I have it? It’s like a treat of the week, only better.”     
She would have walked away if she had not noticed my friend and her brother giggling away at me just off to the side.
     “Sorry kid,” she said, “smiles are just smiles. Have a treat of the week … and go kick your friend in the shins for me.”

Playing With People: Bathroom Accessories

Next time you have a party or just someone over, place something funny and surprising in your bathroom. It could be a musical soap dish, a faux fur behind the hand towel, or even the singing fish you got for your birthday last year. Wait until some unsuspecting soul has to use the bathroom then make sure everyone else knows what’s going on. Listen for their screams of surprise. When the person finally comes back to the party and says “you have something weird in your bathroom” fain ignorance and make them explain what happened. It will be very funny indeed! My parents did this when I was little. I can’t for the life of me remember exactly what was in the bathroom … but everyone seemed to have a lot of fun with this gag!

Enjoyed this post? Try:
PWP:Progressive Party
PWP:The Guest Book

Playing With People: Progressive Party

Here's an idea that I culled from Jim Davis's book: Garlfield, How to Party. Yes, I'm am not only admitting to the fact that I took a humour book seriously, but that I am actually concidering putting that info into practice. Here's the idea. Take a bunch of party goers, snacks, and one unsuspecting host, mix.

The party goers get together and plan the party before the event. They decide who will bring and make food, what decorations or theme will be made and arrange the date. It is important that the host of the party not know any of these details. The day of the party arrives. The first guest stands on the doorstep bearing food.

"Surprise!"

Then the second guest dings the bell, "well, this is unexpected."

A third, "um, just what is going on!"

You get the idea. The party is then in full swing and the best part is, the host doesn't have to clean any dishes!

Enjoyed this post? Try:

The Guest Book
The Elevator

Playing with People: The Elevator

Why just stand in an elevator when you can play with people’s minds?

When you walk into an elevator do not turn to face the doors. After all, there is no rule that you must face the only exit. Just common sense, and who needs that all the time? Instead, stay facing the back of the elevator and let the hilarity ensue.


Enjoy this post? Try these:
Playing With People:The explaination
PWP:The Guest Book

Playing with People

Notes On: Playing With People

Ah, the things I like to do. I love jokes, fun and pranks. My parents had great friends who always loved playing jokes on each other. Their parties were always a lot of fun and I often went to sleep to the sounds of people laughing at the silly things that were going on. Of course, to me, the prank or fun isn’t really fun unless everyone gets a kick out of it, including the pranked-on, so I’ll try to keep any suggestions within those parameters. I’ll also try to post ideas as often as I can. Go on, have a little fun with your life! Try some of these fun things, or just imagine yourself doing it. It will bring a smile to your face!

Playing With People: The Guest Book

Etiquette says: A good host or hostess should provide a guest book by the front door.

Here’s my suggestion:
Indeed! Get a guest book! Beside it have a box of silly glasses, hats and signs. As each guest walks in the door insist that they choose one to put on. Guests could be anyone that steps inside the door, Fed Ex Delivery Person, your kid’s school friends, important politicians on the campaign trail … you get the idea. Take a picture for posterity. Place in guest book.