Friday, March 24, 2006

Here's $1,000,000!

Just kidding! However, here’s what I would do with my million.

Go to an expensive furniture store with my brother. Sit on all the sofas and:
  • Pretend that we are watching a sports channel. Complete with shouting,cheering and ‘channel changing’.
  • Rearrange the coffee tables so that our pretend drinks are within reach.
  • Make comments like: “Lay down on it, ‘Bob’. Stretch right out and see if it’s long enough for a good nap.”
  • Convince the salesman to take off his shoes and sit with us on a three seater sofa. Discuss the fine points of "Does it really seat three people?"
  • Purchase the most beautiful, wonderful sofa and say, "Ship it!"

Get an ice cream truck for my house. A real ice cream and gelato truck. I don’t want to gain a ton of weight though, so here’s my plan.
  • The driver of the ice cream truck would drive around the block.
  • My family and I would chase it.
  • When the truck has completed a full curcuit we can all have an ice cream.

Hire someone to do some of the household things I hate to do.
  • One person would follow my children around and say things like. “Pick that up. Don’t leave that there. Quit hitting your sister.”
  • Another person would be in charge of the bathroom. Someone comes out; they go in and clean up. They would also hand out scented towels and do foot massages.

Time share a jet plane so I could fly the whole family to such exotic locations as:
  • My brother’s backyard (wouldn’t he be surprised!)
  • A sausage festival in Germany, Lobster Dinner with Anne in PEI, and crème Brule wherever they are famous for that.
  • Anywhere there’s a theatre production I want to see. Nothing too weird. Must have good snacks. Every weekend.

A tiny, clean house out back that is very, very quiet for writing. And well-insulated. What can I say, with a million dollars I shouldn’t have to feel the cold.

So, as you can see, I would probably not make a great millionaire. However, I would have a lot of fun! Let me know what you would do!


Joel said...

What? Nothing for your loving husband who supports you through thick and thin? Have you forgotten the love of your life and his second passion: Golf? Surely with a million dollars you could see through the jealousy with that little white ball and treat your beau to a new set of clubs... right? Please? Honey?

Cara said...

Oh, all right, all right. How about a mini putt by the ice cream truck. But it has to have a windmill.

Maz said...

i like the ice cream truck running around the block idea, very imaginiative

sikamikanico said...

Here's what I do at furniture stores (you don't need any money!): I hide crouched behind a sofa, and when an unsupecting customer sits on it, I cry out "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

Cara said...

Just how high do people jump? That's a good one!

Waya said...

Hmm, what would I do w/that million?! Well, have to pay off debts for everyone in the whole family and whatever's leftover...get 3 nannies for the 3 kids and go on a nice long vacation w/them and their nannies. ;-)